When to Tell Our Kids About the Birds and the Bees
This occured four nights ago. I was on the computer playing solitaire. Dean and the kids were in the living room watching TV. All of a sudden Dean called me like something was wrong. I was gonna win the game so I didnt move my butt right away. He hollered again, "you have to get here right now." Okay, okay I'm coming.
In the living room, I instantly noticed something serious was going on. The TV was turned off. The kids were sitting quietly on the couch opposite from each other. They were all waiting for me to have a seat. I knew we're gonna have an important little pow-wow again.
Me: "What's going on?"
Dean: "We were watching TV and there was this scene of a couple making out. Then Marc said, 'oh no... they're gonna have sex.' "
Me: "Hmm, Marc, why did you say that? Do you know what sex is?"
Marc: "Yes, Ate (her sister) told me. She said it's when a boy and a girl kiss in bed."
Marielle: "No, I didnt tell you that!"
Marc: "Yes, you did."
Marielle: "No."
Marc: "Yes."
Me: "Stop it. Neither one of you knows what sex really is so ... dont say anything that you dont know about, ok?"
Marc: "Can someone tell me what it's about though?"
Dean: "Yes, we will tell you but right now, Mama and I have to talk. Why dont you two go to your rooms."
Our kids have their own notion about sex. My daughter asked me what sex is last year. I answered her question but not directly. I really didnt tell her what she needed to know. I knew that there's a best way to tell a child about sex. And at that time I didnt know how. I still dont even until now.
I know as parents it is our responsibility to educate our kids about sex and puberty. Sooner or later, they will start asking why they have hair growth down there, why it feels good when they touch it, why does it get hard sometimes, why do man and woman kiss, how are babies made, etc.
Sex education for them is important. It's not just about understanding their private parts. It's also teaching them what's right and what's wrong. It's the parents' way of protecting their kids from sexual abuse, teenage pregnancy, and sexually transmitted diseases. I also want my kids to be aware that premarital sex is not right. I always tell them that everyone is accountable to God. That everyone has two choices -- to do right or wrong. And whatever decision he/she makes in life, there is a consequence.
Last night I was sitting on Dean's lap as he was checking his emails. Our computer is temporarily placed near the kitchen and close by is the laundry room where I had my last load of clothes running in the dryer. Dean turned his head to kiss me but I moved my head away from his. "Why was that?" he asked. I said, "Marc might see us and I dont want him to think that 'Ma and Pa are having sex in the kitchen in front of the computer while Ma is doing laundry.' " We laughed. But on a serious note, we do need to sit down and break it to them gently. Tonight. And separately, of course.
-
In the living room, I instantly noticed something serious was going on. The TV was turned off. The kids were sitting quietly on the couch opposite from each other. They were all waiting for me to have a seat. I knew we're gonna have an important little pow-wow again.
Me: "What's going on?"
Dean: "We were watching TV and there was this scene of a couple making out. Then Marc said, 'oh no... they're gonna have sex.' "
Me: "Hmm, Marc, why did you say that? Do you know what sex is?"
Marc: "Yes, Ate (her sister) told me. She said it's when a boy and a girl kiss in bed."
Marielle: "No, I didnt tell you that!"
Marc: "Yes, you did."
Marielle: "No."
Marc: "Yes."
Me: "Stop it. Neither one of you knows what sex really is so ... dont say anything that you dont know about, ok?"
Marc: "Can someone tell me what it's about though?"
Dean: "Yes, we will tell you but right now, Mama and I have to talk. Why dont you two go to your rooms."
Our kids have their own notion about sex. My daughter asked me what sex is last year. I answered her question but not directly. I really didnt tell her what she needed to know. I knew that there's a best way to tell a child about sex. And at that time I didnt know how. I still dont even until now.
I know as parents it is our responsibility to educate our kids about sex and puberty. Sooner or later, they will start asking why they have hair growth down there, why it feels good when they touch it, why does it get hard sometimes, why do man and woman kiss, how are babies made, etc.
Sex education for them is important. It's not just about understanding their private parts. It's also teaching them what's right and what's wrong. It's the parents' way of protecting their kids from sexual abuse, teenage pregnancy, and sexually transmitted diseases. I also want my kids to be aware that premarital sex is not right. I always tell them that everyone is accountable to God. That everyone has two choices -- to do right or wrong. And whatever decision he/she makes in life, there is a consequence.
Last night I was sitting on Dean's lap as he was checking his emails. Our computer is temporarily placed near the kitchen and close by is the laundry room where I had my last load of clothes running in the dryer. Dean turned his head to kiss me but I moved my head away from his. "Why was that?" he asked. I said, "Marc might see us and I dont want him to think that 'Ma and Pa are having sex in the kitchen in front of the computer while Ma is doing laundry.' " We laughed. But on a serious note, we do need to sit down and break it to them gently. Tonight. And separately, of course.
-
4 Comments:
At July 15, 2007 5:36 PM, Dindin said…
"we do need to sit down and break it to them gently. Tonight.
Yay, Sounds scary.. Good luck, Ate! =)
At July 16, 2007 9:01 AM, Anonymous said…
cant imagine myself being in a situation like that....baka bigla na lang ako ma-flip sa sobrang wala akong masabi para maipaliwanag ng mabuti sa mga bata ang ibig sabihin ng "sex".
At July 16, 2007 4:55 PM, Anonymous said…
yeap we parents have to tell them about sex. it's our responsibil;ty kita mo yan o sa atin sa pinas no sex ed. tsaka dinidiscourage ng mga tao sa atin ayun dami nabuntis! you know u can fin some information or brochures that can be given to your kids suitable of their ages. you can go to your nearest Planned Parenthood and they have information about sex education at their age. just tell them all about it and tell them that it is normal but should be done when they are older and when they are ready.goodluck
At July 18, 2007 12:12 AM, RoSeLLe said…
Hi Au! Just droppin by to say hi! :) About this topic, I'm glad that I wont be dealing with this kind of stuff at this point. Still have a lot of time to think about how to explain it to my bulilit here. :) Take Care!
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